In the area I grew up in, there's this weird thing that renders many folks virtually unable to say the word "wash" the way it's supposed to be pronounced. Why? I don't fucking know. Maybe they're drinking water from the Mon River. Maybe they're lazy. It's always kind of annoyed me, but what's a girl to do?
The first type of offender says warsh. Yep - with an r. A fucking r. Hey - asshats - there's no r in the spelling of that word. So don't pronounce it that way. These are the worst offenders in my opinion. It makes them sound stupid and classless and I really.fucking.hate.it.
The second type says woosh. Like the sound you would make when describing a mighty wind blowing through the trees. Again, I have no explanation for this, but at least they aren't adding a letter to the word that really isn't there.
This brings me to my washing machine (prounounced like wash), which decided to stop working on Wednesday. IB had some of his work shirts in the machine, and when I went down to take the dogs out before bed, I was greeted by a haze of smoke and the smell of burning rubber. Fuck fuck fuckity fuck fuck. Apparently the pump stopped working, so the water stayed in the bucket, then it tried to do the spin cycle, which burned out the belt. A quick phone call to my dad (who knows everything) determined that it likely wouldn't be worth trying to repair, so off we go to buy a new one.
I should mention here that we have never paid for a washing machine before. When we bought our house 9 years ago, my dad gave us one that he had sitting around. When it crapped out a few years later, he gave us another one that he had loned to my sis and bro-in-law when theirs went on the fritz. Since my dad's seemingly neverending supply of washing machines has apparently run out - for the first time ever - we are buying a new washer. Not too shabby to be 31 and never had to make this purchase before.
On the other hand, our house is currently for sale. And we plan to leave the washer and dryer for the new owners. Mostly because I want to buy a set like this...awwwww yeeeeeah. Those suckers turn me on. I never thought I would become the kind of woman who would lust after large appliances, but there ya go. Anywho, our cunt of a washer deciding to break this week basically means we're going out tonight to buy a new washer for someone else.
Therefore, instead of my first washing machine purchase being one that makes my nipples hard, it's going to be one that I couldn't care less about. One that could be puke green in color and only have one button that says "wash the fucking clothes". One that I will use for (hopefully) only a couple of months and then leave in my basement for the new owners to clean their underwear in.
Fucker. :(
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